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Wow how the year flies!

One year ago I was starting my unemployment! Do you know how I know that? Thanks to Facebook you can see what you posted a year earlier and I was enjoying (ok that was loose terms) watching my 30+ dvr'd shows on tv while I was figuring out what to make of the forms for unemployment and we were surviving without insurance and Travis' business was failing. Fun times... NOT!

But what a difference a year makes! I now have 2 part-time jobs that I absolutely love and wouldn't trade for the world. God knew what he was doing when he shut that door. He wanted me to spend more time with my family to appreciate the little things. I have never been able to do that. And when I say little things I mean LITTLE. We were super duper poor for a while last year. We were our Sunday School's Angel tree. Sometimes to have to hit rock bottom to realize how good you actually had it. But we didn't have our priorities straight. I know I didn't.

Priority #1 needs to be God, Priority #2 FAMILY and I didn't have either of those at the top in the last couple of year and now I do and I feel great!

And I thank God everyday for giving me the chance to put those priorities in order before it was too late. Before my boys were grown and I couldn't enjoy the little things!

Dealing with self-esteem issues at 8??

I am not quite sure how to deal with this?? Last night as I was saying Logan's prayers after we ended. I said, "I love you." And he says, "Well I don't love me." That crushed my heart and soul. Well I continue laying next to him to find out what he means by that. I ask, "Do you mean when you look in the mirror, or you don't love that you are awesome at baseball or reading or math?" He says, "I am weird." I point to myself and say, "HELLO!!, so am I!!, we all are!" He also says that he hates wearing glasses, I again point at myself wearing glasses and tell him that at least his are cool and not the ones that cover his whole face like mine did in elementary.

He is still not cheered up by this point!! I don't know what to do??? He won't talk to me straight. I am tearing up by this point. I tell him his is loved by so many people and I name them and I tell him most of all he is love by God and if he ever need someone to talk to God will always listen and then I teach him about praying. Not the nightly prayers we say (we say Now I Lay Me) I say that every night I just talk to God, I tell him that God knows what we are thinking but he likes to hear us talk too. I told him that he can still talk to daddy and I anytime but if there is ever anything he just needs to get out, to pray.

I am just so worried, what should I do???

Feelings I shouldn't be having...

I get on FB this morning and read that one of my friends surprised her hubby with a trip to Vegas for his 40th. Instead of being extremely exited for her for pulling off a great surprise, she had 3 of his friends pick him up at 4:30am to take him to the airport! I am instead bummed and hurt for Travis that he wasn't invited. Now how dumb is that. I mean it put me into a super slump all day long!! I can't pull myself out of it... (Maybe it is just hormones.)

But it isn't my business who was invited on the trip but I just know the moment he walks in the door tonight he is going to be super deflated and walk around the house moping and I would too if I was him. The 4 men that went are ones that he consider his good friends. He would have had a BLAST! We hung out with them all last week as a couples party so I can totally understand why he would be hurt. It is just like a kick in the gut, because it makes me feel like we just aren't good enough, still. I know once again dumb thoughts but they are the ones I am having... UGH...

Then when they return all we will hear about is what a great time they had and they will have all these inside jokes and just sit there and rub it in his face, kind of like his wife did this morning when were texting back and forth and she was going on and on about them picking him up and how great of a job they did and fun it was to surprise him... I just wanted to either puke or scream or do both!!

Happy, FINALLY!!

It has only taken almost 9 months but we listened and waited patiently for God and He delievered and Travis and I couldn't be more happy!!

Wow I just realized that I could have had a baby in that amount of time!! During my drought of full-time employment I got to spend some much needed boy time with my two beautiful children!! I got to soak up attention from them and dole out much needed attention to them!! I still worked, don't get me wrong, I subbed around the school district as well as teaching at TCC then just a week ago I started working at the Church!! I am now the Group Life Coordinator and I am so excited!! This is the job of a lifetime!! Without my Sunday School class (my small group) Travis and I would have been lost throughout this jobloss adventure! They were rock and kept us grounded and during the holiday season, in our house!! Like is said God answers prayers!

Travis too changed employment he is now a Sales Manager and loving it! He actually came home from work and said I had to repremand an employee today, with a smile on his face!! WHAT!?! Who gets excited about things like that???

Of course we are still having to pay the lease on his old office until someone rents it, that is the big elephant in the room, but God is still providing... We are slowly paying of the debt we were getting in to. Piece by piece we are digging out!!

And best of all, I get to be a semi-stay at home mom!! WHAT?!?! Never in a million years would I think I would be excited but my boys are older and self sufficient and we are going to Hawaiian Falls and the pool and doing fun stuff!! It has already been so much fun getting to pick them up from school almost everyday and just seeing them so much! I didn't realize how much I was missing!

God is Big Enough!!

Really?!?

I hate it when you are honest and then it comes back to bite you in the butt! So I have to report twice month to the unemployment office about working, how I am doing with applying for jobs, if I was able to. Well the weeks it asked about this last time were December 19 - January 1 my kids were out for Christmas. One of the questions were you able to work and I said no, childcare. (Which was an option and obviously wasn't a lie).

Well I get a message from them saying I need to call in order for my unemployment to process. I call. The woman says you checked no, why. I said the way the question was worded it there was no, I would have found childcare, if offered a job. So she changed it and it was processed. Money deposited.

Today we get a letter in the mail that says the claim has now been denied due to saying I didn't have childcare, not by the unemployment agency buy by my old employer and now that we have already received the money (and spent on bills) we have to pay them back! Can someone please tell me where we are going to come up with $815 to pay them back?

Plus the $250 I am going to pay to get just one of my 3 prescriptions tonight on top of the $75.80 it cost me just to go to the dr today???

Gosh I hope this job I interviewed for this week is the answer to our prayers!